Tuesday, November 16, 2010

bleed between the lines

time after time I truly wonder if i have lost my mind
in a world full of fake smiles hiding condescending remarks
and where lieing to ones self has become a graceful art
i ponder if maybe these people hate themselves
for conforming and putting there dreams on a self
i exist in a country paved in broken premise's
and built on the  backs of the poor and ignorant
who ask not what there country can do for them
i was born in a state not of mind or of hope but of purpose
they needed me to serve to fight and to die
to help push home there goal there greatest lie
i don't know why from day one i was breed to do one task
and like those of around me i never thought to ask
i and now in side my head i ponder  the meaning of it all
and pour these thoughts on to a page the ink pouring out
like the blood across the sand that was shed my these hands
so i bleed between these lines and hide my shame with in a rhyme

Monday, September 27, 2010

Mindless Ramblings of a madman v5

Life in song

so i been thinking about life and moments that i have had and i realized there's a song for everything and every moment. Metallica unforgiven defines my love life, abney parks Airship pirates is my life style, Celldwellers own little World is my mind state, ICP's Homies is how i think and feel about my Friends.
Stero mudd's Pain is a musical point of view on how i see the world. i can go on for hours but i wont.

Wednesday, September 22, 2010

About me...?

there's a thin line between genius and insanity,so much pain inside of me, i try my hardest not to stray, but path twist and turns an i lose my way, i scream into a mic and break the silence,music mixed with poetry like sex mixed with violence. so many people think they know the real me, there blinded to the fact i still have yet to find me, in a world so sick and sadistic, i was looking for love but seem to just miss it. all i have is a pen and a pad, i write out my nightmares and dreams no matter how sad. i bleed on a page full of tears and ink stains. but its the only way clear my brain. i take it all and put in my music so hopefully others can use it. so for those of you that asked YOU are the reason i do this the reason i put my self through this I am a ex 82nd airborne paratrooper,stripper,Dj,and much more, i have been a son a brother never a father,music is my life, my heart beats in in 4/4 my veins bleed a harmony what more can i say "about me" just when you think I am gone i jump right back with some sick shit on a new track,starting a mosh pit and given the mainstream a fat limp, i don't to hip hop , our rap, i don't do that emo crap i make music to wake the dead, i make music to split your head i infect your mental state like a plague, when the music stops so does your heart, then i vanish in the dark this is audio chaos and its my art, until we meet again just remember you have been blessed by the mark of sin

Mindless ramblings of a Mad man V.1

is any of this real
i would really like to know
is this truely what a feel
will this feeling ever grow
am i really who i was
or have i begain to evole
it seems iam a simple problem
that no one can solve
in the quest to find myself
ive seem to gotten lost
i tryed to sale my soul
but the devil couldnt pay the cost
and now it seems my freind
that indeed this is were it ends
i found my self in you
cuase my heart never seems to break
it only twists and bends
i guess will see just how much it can take

Mindless ramblings of a Mad man V.2

once again i seem to find
some where along this walk called life
that i have lost my mind
some where under the chaos and strife
i know its here somewhere
burried under what i should have done
or maybe its over there
under what i could have said
i checked the box of regrets
and that pile of ex girlfreinds
seems to have wondered off like a pet
i search my room to no end
maybe if i retrace my steps
mother said i had it when i left
teacher said i had most of it last she knew
the Drill Sergent said he took a part of it
but i signed off on that to
so it seem bit my bit over time
i have lost it, so if you see it please
send me peice of mind

Mindless ramblings of a Mad man V.2.5

I have a addiction with out a drug
a affliction with out a cause
can you be my symptom my hallucinogen
staring at a map trying to get lost
running in the sun praying for the rain
so damn hard to step outside the mundane
i cant feel the guilt through the pain...

i cant finish this..

Mindless ramblings of a Mad man V.4

United states of apathy

 I have a theory In the darkest depths of the human mind we all have a beast lurking , that we all feel that pull of “who will know”  or “its not my problem”. We see the homeless , bad parents, abandon children the news and media feeds us these images of starving people in 3rd world nations and pulls at our heart strings when the same thing is going place here in the United states of internal apathy. We care when its “over there” we send millions in aid to “them” and sink our selves into debt to forgein powers. But what about “over Here” what about “us” so I thought today what if just for a second we did the selfish thing what if we gave in to our beast as a nation and took care of our own what if we looked at these 3rd world nations and said “ Its not our problem? Would we be the devils in this game or would it make us better as a nation. I don’t know.

I set listening to “people” arguing over foreign police one stating “ we need to send more aid to **** the other ranting that “we need to go to war with **** and get that oil” for 2 hours the went at it and I realized not once did they say anything about helping people here. Is this the beast we hold in our hearts that makes us blind to things in front of us or is it just Apathy. People complain about violence on TV  and movies they complain that Harry Potter is evil, there’s movements in the thousands against gay marriage and gay adoption, I wonder if we directed all the energy  thrown at these small things in to things like homelessness or job creation maybe even education , maybe we would still have the space program or have reached the moon or colonized the stars hell maybe even we wouldn’t be so far behind these 3rd world country’s  yes I mean behind , during my time in the army I watched people looking out for each other, like neighbors should which is a rare sight here at “home”.

Now this is not a rant against the good old USA or  for gay rights or anything like that, I am a simple man looking at the world and realizing somethings very wrong. Iam not christian  by far but I do believe there was once a Eden and we have fallen so far from it. I cant be the only one that feels this way.